Dreamer diary #1

Hi lipstickdreamers! Well, this is a segment in this blog where I'll talk about how I feel at the moment.
MOOD: Lost

Pursuing a dream is hard. Last night, I saw a video on youtube( read; I'm a youtube addict) by danisnotonfire and he really said how I felt. 

It has been a little bit more than a month ago that I decided to be a 'school drop out' which means I don't have a plan anymore. Since my early teenage years, I always wanted to be an interpreter. Languages have always been something interesting to me. So, for years I had planned every step of the way to become an interpreter. Finish my studies, go for a year to Australia and when I come back try to enter into the European Commission.Yes, I saw it big but this was everything I wanted back then. Then, I started to do make-up and I realized that becoming an interpreter was nothing for me. It took a long time to realize it. But now, I'm just lost.I'm not a careless student anymore like most of the youngster of my age. I have responsibilities and it scares the hell out of me. I don't regret the decision I made but yes, I'm basicly young and lost.

Source: weheartit

I'm really a positive minded girl towards others but I'm not when it comes to me.My name,Saloua, means to comfort people and that's what I do best but I cannot comfort myself. Now, I'm here doing nothing of my days and thinking about everything in my life. Right now, nothing really positive came out. The thing that hurts most is when people say that it's my own fault that I'm feeling this way. In the end, I think I just have to believe that everything will be ok.Yes, I know, why am I writing this down? It is a kind of therapy for me and maybe it will help somebody that feels the same way as I am. YOU ARE NOT ALONE ;)


" If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced. " -Vincent Van Gogh


Saloua